year 6

i'm really happy with the way this one turned out. i scraplifted the idea from elsie flannigan's 52 scrapbooking challenges (pg. 47). i'm trying to learn how to layer more without looking too cluttered.

there's no journaling on this, but it's a family picture taken at our local park on our sixth wedding anniversary (the title would've been better as "6 years" now that i think about it). rupert and i totally forgot it was our anniversary and instead of going out we went for a walk to hit baseballs with ian at the park.

i remember :: maya fussing after awhile because she didn't want to be strapped into her stroller; gnats flying all over the place (hate that!); ian was so proud of the "best attitude" baseball he earned at baseball camp; i sat on orange graffiti on the park bench and got my butt graffited second-hand; and rupert took a picture of it!

[click on picture for details about materials.]

super duper huge oops

so, if all had gone according to plan, we should've been driving from bozeman to big sky, montana right now. clearly, i'm not posting this from a car. which means we didn't get to bozeman. which means our 5-day winter vacation is not off to a good start.

our flight was supposed to leave at 6am this morning. we got to the airport at 5 but apparently that was not early enough. when we tried to check in the computer said we were too late to check baggage and, therefore, too late to get on the darn plane (which is where my father- and brother-in-law were waiting for us).

we got the typical run around from the airline, tried to find an alternate route to montana, and were not successful. when i broke the news to ian that we missed our flight and it looked like the next available flight wasn't until friday (the day we were supposed to come back) he started to cry. he was so disappointed and it crushed our hearts that because we didn't get to the airport early enough we had ruined christmas for our son.

my mom picked us up from the airport and drove us home. we lugged our heavy baggage back into the house and sat down on the couch completely deflated. rupert and i only got 2 hours of sleep because we spent hours packing and preparing for the trip after celebrating an early christmas with my folks. the family vacation we had planned for months was not going to happen; no skiing for ian, no first snow for maya, no walk in the snowy woods for me and rupert. rupert's aunt had also supplied us with wonderful ski jackets and pants, gloves, etc. and they were all for naught.

but rupert was determined to go somewhere cold and snowy. in the end we decided that he and ian would make the trip by flying into missoula (where rupert grew up) and then driving (in the snow) for four hours to big sky. not to be a party-pooper or anything, but i was just not willing to go through all of that with maya. so she and i will stay home.

frankly, it sucks that we won't be together for five days of this winter vacation, but there was no way we could disappoint ian by not delivering on what we had promised him: snow.

hopefully rupert will take some wonderful photos and video of them in montana. and hopefully maya won't drive me crazy for five days. it'll be quite the winter vacation, no?

[the one good thing that came out of this: the man who took one of our seats from the lax --> denver leg of our flight had been on stand-by since the 21st. at least he was able to get home for christmas.]

merry chanumas!

[knott's berry farm :: december 16, 2006]

happy holidays to my friends and family!

the month since thanksgiving just flew by and before i could get my lazy butt off the couch it's now the last day of chanukah and we're four days away from christmas. where indeed did the days go? our holiday card will be going out in the mail this afternoon -- god willing -- but no end-of-the-year-recap-letter will be included. that's what this blog post is for.

looking back on 2006, single days seemed uneventful and slow. but the year as a whole passed more quickly than any year in recent memory. i blame it on chasing after two kids, hitting 30, and poor time management. i have many a new year's resolution to prevent 2007 from being a repeat of '06 ... but we all know what happens with new year's resolutions.

i am happy to report that ian is doing quite well in first grade despite some initial emotional adjustments that had to be made (tweaking still in progress). he reads like a maniac (chapter books and non-fiction reference books), obsessed over geography the first half of the year, and is now quite enamored with lego star wars. he continues to make dad proud with his espn-watching, sports stats reciting, and ball playing. he had a great soccer season and i'm sure he'll enjoy his second year of t-ball in the spring.

maya continues to terrorize us daily with her tantrums, demands, and mood swings. however, being with her 24 hours a day has desensitized me and i've gotten used to it; most days she seems fine to me. not quite so with rupert. being the smart, manipulative type, maya quickly figured out that daddy has "sucker" tattooed across his forehead and she can get him to do almost anything. poor rupert is exhausted and a slave to maya's whims while mama is off in her own world ignoring her children and husband. so far maya has only taken a few steps; she doesn't seem ready or willing to walk yet. i'm in no hurry to have to chase her around so i don't care about her progress in that front. the one thing i'm making an effort with is speaking japanese to her. as a result, she doesn't talk as much as other babies (it takes longer for babies to process two languages in their head before actually speaking), but she clearly understands what we say in both languages. and a positive side effect has been that ian is showing more interest in japanese.

rupert, when he's not being the devoted father that he is, goes to work diligently everyday. he works longer hours than he did at ucla and we all wish he would come home earlier. i secretly think he goes to work earlier and stays longer so he doesn't have to deal with us! i would like to tell you what he does as a career, but i'm not quite sure. his title is educational research analyst for los angeles unified school district, but beyond that you'll have to ask him directly for more details. while he seems to be content (for the most part) at work, he applied to the phd program at ucla's school of education for next fall; we'll find out in the spring if he'll be a student again. at night, after the kids have gone to bed, rupert watches an inordinate amount of television thanks to the cable his mom signed us up for as part of his birthday present this year. other than that he constantly (and unsuccessfully) battles the weeds in our yard, refereed some games for ian's soccer team, escaped for five days in the spring to a conference/training at northwestern university, and deals with the biggest pains in the butt (me and maya) on a daily basis. for that i am grateful.

as for me, i'm at home with the kids. i don't seem to accomplish much on a daily basis but i'm as content as i'm gonna be. after all, i get to watch every minute of my kids growing up and changing. to this day i can't believe they are my children, my flesh and blood, that they came out of my body. it continues to be surreal. when i'm not being a "good enough" mother and wife i'm usually sitting at the computer checking out the blogosphere, scrapbooking, reading or trying to get some much needed sleep. i've also been a bit more adventurous in the kitchen, trying out new (super simple) recipes so i can expand my culinary repertoire. i've become totally established in my stay-at-home mom capacity that i'm not sure i could ever go back to work. but if rupert is accepted into the phd program i'll have to start working to help pay the mortgage. but what could i do? if you have any ideas, please let me know. (seriously.) right now my interests lean towards books; i've considered getting a retail job at a bookstore, becoming a librarian, or getting my masters in children's literature. sadly, all of these things require a level of commitment and work i'm just not accustomed to.

for awhile there i thought family life was pretty static. turns out i was wrong. while it seems like things never change, families are constantly evolving (albeit at a snail's pace). i hope that 2007 brings some changes that i'm capable of dealing with. there are so many things i am looking forward to: ian's continued development and progress socially and academically, maya walking and talking, rupert fulfilling his professional and academic goals, and my vacation to argentina!

and, of course, i wish for peace, health and happiness to my family and yours. eat, drink & be merry, hug the ones you love, do something a bit daring and crazy, and drop me a line when you get a chance. here's to a fantastic 2007 -- cheers!

y

in memoriam :: tomiko kawamoto & tadamasa fujita

takara (treasure)

patterned paper: bo-bunny press
tab: 7 gypsies
frame: impress rubber stamps
magnet word: nickelodeon ("wing")
word stickers: k&co
flower eyelet: ?
flower brad: making memories
flower stamp: kodomo no kao
circle clip: close to my heart
angel and wing stickers: ? (got it in japan)
letter stamps: inkadinkadoo ("takara"), hero arts ("treasure")
japanese letter stamps: shachihata
journaling: september 23, '05 blog post

on surviving one year

having one child makes time pass quickly. having two children makes the time go by in the blink of an eye. i'm having a hard time believing that we've had maya in our family for one year.

i have whined and complained a great deal this past year (even more than usual). the adjustment from having a fairly self-sufficient, well-behaved boy to having a demanding, crazy baby girl was more than i could take on some days. i had doubts constantly about whether i made the right decision to expand our family.

but things must happen for a reason because, upon reflection, the past year has changed me in some ways ... hopefully for the better. i'm not necessarily a better parent by any means; i'm far less involved with my children than most parents are. and i'm not necessarily a better homemaker either; the chores still pile up and i don't accomplish much on most days. regardless of my lack of progress on these two fronts, however, i feel more balanced.

"find balance in your life" seems to be the mantra for the modern mom. it would be wonderful if we could achieve complete balance, but it's pretty darn close to being impossible. yet, modern moms try and try and try to achieve balance in everything they do, often at the expense of their own sanity. perhaps we try too hard and add more pressure, all in the name of "finding balance." at some point in the last year i gave that up. and you know what? i feel like i'm more balanced because in the back of my mind i don't constantly hear, "do this, do that, accomplish more, be more to more people, etc. etc." as a result, i'm not driving myself crazy when i don't finish everything on my to-do list, when i skip a day (or two or three) of cleaning, when i decide i'd rather read than make dinner. i'm happier, more rested, and more willing to do those chores when i find an extra minute or two. and, as often as i feel like i'm just going to lose it, i don't.

the last year has taught me to see the bigger picture. sure i have lots of bad days, but i just tell myself, "this too shall pass." and it does. i'm learning to see past the minutiae of every last gosh darn thing and embrace the imperfections of life. it's always been part of my personality to dwell on the negative of the past; minor, trivial things would haunt me forever. i was holding myself back from seeing the joy in today and the potential of tomorrow.

having maya in my life reminds me everyday that being a parent is the toughest job in the world. what could be more important, demanding, and agonizing than trying to raise a decent human being? are we making the right choices? what more can we do? but then i look at maya, and all she wants is to be loved; for us to smile at her, roll the ball around for her, feed her, take her outside for a walk, and sing to her. and is that difficult? nope. just doing those things will probably help her to become a decent human being more than teaching her the alphabet, moving to a neighborhood with a good school district, or signing her up for tons of classes. i realize those things could help her future, but the fundamental thing about being a good parent is to be there for your child(ren).

so, for the next year, and the many years that follow, that's what i'll try to do for maya and ian. it took me six years of being a parent to figure this out. and i honestly believe that i may not have realized this if i hadn't had a second child. for that, i'm grateful to my children: to ian for putting up with me (and my mistakes) for the last six years, and to maya for teaching me to be a better parent.

it's all about you graduate

cardstock: ?
patterned paper: urban lily
acrylic paint: lil davis (pink), delta (cream)
date stamp: heidi swapp
rub-ons: heidi swapp (black cursive letters), making memories (phrase), doodlebug (white letters)

gettin' older

today is my sister's birthday; she's now a whopping 23 years old. she's in a good place in her life, i think (i'm just assuming): she's a senior at the university of hawaii, living with her best friend in a condo in honolulu, dating, etc. when i was 23 i was in grad school (for just a little while), engaged and just months away from getting pregnant. i think it just further proves how totally opposite we are.

being seven years her senior it was always so hard to relate to her. being completely different people didn't help to bridge the gap we felt; we just didn't understand each other. but as we've gotten older i think that's changing. i'm really looking forward to getting to know her better as a person, to stop looking at her as a "baby," and to stop acting like her third parent. but i think in some ways my sister appreciates the nagging that comes from me -- no matter how old you are, you always take advice and concern from your parents with a grain of salt. but coming from a sister, i think it's different.

in any case, i miss her being so far away. i wish she lived closer so the kids could be with their nene. i can't wait for her to graduate and come home.

happy birthday, A!